Adelaide CofD News Stories

OOC: These news stories are published in various news outlets - TV, Radio, Newspaper etc. If your character does not subscribe to any of these things because they're a hermit or so ancient that these things are still very new to them, then disregard these news stories.

Glossary: Beefood (Buzzfeed), Twitbook (Facebook), Facewit (Twitter)

These news stories are entirely fictional and are written for entertainment purposes.

Last Update: 20/3/17

17 Ways This Local Psychic will Amaze you. You won't believe number 3 (24/03/2017)
Local Psychic and Mystic showman demonstrated his talent. Johnny Whisper, a Psychic with seven major crimes solved to his name, put on an amazing show for the crowd. Keeping with the surreal nature of the Fringe Whisper kept his act off beat and surreal.
1. Sleep of the Dead
<photo of woman laying on a table>
Johnny Whisper wowed the crowd by putting this woman in a hypnotic trance she appeared dead. Select members of the crowd were even asked to try to find her pulse and couldn't.
2. The Flickering Darkness
Calling to the spirits to come forward and aid him the lights started to flicker off, car, street and even the lights on phones.
3. Photos Can Lie
<A photo of the street. No Johnny>
Next Johnny just waved his hand a smiled. Told us it was photo time. He posed. A few people took photos. He told them to check the pictures. Through some illusion or trickery he was not on any of the pictures.
4. Any Card
While I have seen people do card tricks this one was new. Johnny had someone pick a card and show him. Then he let the crowd pass cards between them as they pleased. He focused his powers and pointed at one person. They revealed the card they had and presto, it was the selected card.
(The Article Continues...)

Mum's open day care for Un-vaccinated Children. (20/03/2017)
Sparks fly as Mother of 3 and self proclaimed Anti-Vax Queen Patricia Door announces to the public via Facewit that she's going to be Starting her own Day care specifically for Un-vaccinated Children. "Big Pharma has gotten into the public daycare system, telling us mothers how to raise our children by placing horrible toxins into their bodies. This way they can all get sick together and gain the natural immunity our body gets from being sick" Doctor Gregory Tristen from the Royal Adelaide Hospital had this to say in response "Patricia seems to be your run of the Mill Anti-Vaxer, Against anything her GP says even if its beneficial to her Children, Why anyone would want to leave their kids with her for 9 to 10 hours of the day baffles me" More on this story to come in the coming weeks.

Local Girl found stripped of Flesh (19/03/2017)
A young girl from North Adelaide Chelsea Burton's body was found last Friday night at 7:35pm in Kadlitpina Park. Officers are Baffled at the lack of witnesses with the Fringe so full of life. The young girls body was found hanging skinless from a Tree just above the "Freakshow" slideshow. Performers of the Fringe promise patrons that there will be no closure of events and that they will be helping the police with the Investigation as much as they can. If anyone has any information please contact police on 000.

Crime Increase, No one is Safe from the 5 finger Gangs (16/03/2017)
Adelaide Crime is on the Rise in recent days as Petty theft, Pick pocketing and Shoplifting reports soar. Many Patrons report underage kids banding together to create gangs of thieves that pick on small Deli's, Convenient Stores and your unsuspecting Grandmothers on their afternoon Bingo trip. Police urge civilians to keep an eye and ear out for these pesky minors.

Paper News Dead, Digital Era Evolves (12/03/2017)
Online Survey says Consumers don't bother buying the newspaper anymore. Instead your average Joe subscribes to his news on the internet on such famous sites like Faceter and Twitbook. Sam Weir Editor of The Advertiser has this to say. "The Digital Era may bring news Faster, but it doesn't always deliver the Facts. Click bait is everywhere these days and you never know if what you're reading is true or not" Joahna Sun one of Beefood's journalists responded with "Why go outside to get your news when it can all be had at the touch of a button? Sure not everything is right, but isn't that the same with the newspapers themselves? We can edit our work online but once its printed. You'd better hope you don't need to change anything" To have your say go to www.whyreadpaperwhyreadonline.org (OOC this is not a real link)


She lost 7 Kilos in less than 3 days, How she did it will Shock you! (11/03/2017)
Eliza Smith single mother of 3 Lives in Prospect just north of the City, in early July last year she found herself with a very odd lump growing just next to her nipple. After some careful consideration and coaching from her friends Eliza went to seek medical attention at the Womens and Childrens Hospital. The Lump baffled Doctors who after many tests concluded that the lump was not Cancer but was in fact a pocket full of Milk. Eliza had fallen to a Phantom Pregnancy so rare that even she didn't know it was happening. The Pocket was weighing her down at a whopping 7kg larger than her normal weight. It took the doctors less than 24 hours to drain the fluid and send her on her way.