Adelaide News Stories
OOC: These news stories are published in various news outlets - TV, Radio, Newspaper etc. If your character does not subscribe to any of these things because they're a hermit or so ancient that these things are still very new to them, then disregard these news stories.
These news stories are entirely fictional and are written for entertainment purposes.
Last updated: 06/7/2016
Opening Night At Lenin's Cabinet (01/08/2016)
The fourth of August will see the reopening of the Northhaven tavern which now operates under the name 'Lenin's Cabinet'. Opening night happy hour is 8pm till midnight. Experienced staff invited to apply for short-term jobs with possible ongoing opportunities.
Gunshots Heard In Hills (14/07/2016)
A police call-out for gunshots fired in the Adelaide hills has sparked a major crime investigation after the firearm was identified as an assault rifle. Residents reported the gunfire late in the evening and while noone was hurt in the incident, police are left puzzled by the bizarre evidence left behind. Initially residents had reports two rounds fired - which occasionally happens with fox or rabbit hunting in the area, but attitudes changed quickly when automatic gunfire was heard. Investigators discovered that a full clip of 30 rounds of ammunition had been discharged from under a tree. There was also evidence of an attempt to bury something, and a short distance away the corpse of a dog that had been burned to death with a home-made incendiary device.
Old Driveway Not Haunted (02/07/2016)
Local councils would like to remind residents that Andrews Walk is not haunted and that Clifton Manor is not the site of gruesome murders. Local residents have lodged further complaints this winter against youths who visit the walk hopig for a supernatural experience. Some visitors, finding the walk to be far less haunted than hoped, rsort to throwing rocks and screaming into the night. "We don;t want to resort to locking the parks at night" said councillor Eckham, "but we will consider doing so if it means keeping our residents safe."
The Blind Text That Could (02/07/2016)
Far far away, behind the word mountains, far from the countries Vokalia and Consonantia, there live the blind texts. Separated they live in Bookmarksgrove right at the coast of the Semantics, a large language ocean. A small river named Duden flows by their place and supplies it with the necessary regelialia. It is a paradisematic country, in which roasted parts of sentences fly into your mouth. Even the all-powerful Pointing has no control about the blind texts it is an almost unorthographic life One day however a small line of blind text by the name of Lorem Ipsum decided to leave for the far World of Grammar. The Big Oxmox advised her not to do so, because there were thousands of bad Commas, wild Question Marks and devious Semikoli, but the Little Blind Text didn’t listen. She packed her seven versalia, put her initial into the belt and made herself on the way. When she reached the first hills of the Italic Mountains, she had a last view back on the skyline of her hometown Bookmarksgrove, the headline of Alphabet Village and the subline of her own road, the Line Lane. Pityful a rethoric question ran over her cheek, then she continued her way. On her way she met a copy. The copy warned the Little Blind Text, that where it came from it would have been rewritten a thousand times and everything that was left from its origin would be the word "and" and the Little Blind Text should turn around and return to its own, safe country. But nothing the copy said could convince her and so it didn’t take long until a few insidious Copy Writers ambushed her, made her drunk with Longe and Parole and dragged her into their agency, where they abused her for their projects again and again. And if she hasn’t been rewritten, then they are still using her.
ATM Dispenses Cash, Bystanders Injured (02/07/2016)
A number of people were in jured on Tuesday when an ATM in Clovelly Park malfunctioned and began dispensing fifty dollar notes. The ATM, operated by St George, dispensed nearly $2000. A four year old child has been taken to hospital suffering trauma from the rush of opportunistic pedestrians.
Local UE Member Found Dead (02/07/2016)
An Adelaidian Urban Explorer drowned in a stormwater drain when caught by yesterday's torrential downpour. The SES would like to remind everyone that stormwater drains are not safe for exploration, especially when sudden increases in water level are likely. The drain, located near the Adelaide Zoo, is undergoing a safety assesment.
Misprinted Article (02/07/2016)
The Adverlieser would like to apologise for any confusion caused by a misprinted article yesterday. The article, titled "The Extremes Of Good And Evil", was supposed to be replaced with a dead donkey. Due to an internal communications error, the placeholder went to print. Adverlieser executeves have promised two dead donkeys today as recompense for yesterday's skipped dead donkey.
Chemist Chain Closing Down (01/07/2016)
The All Night Apothecary chain of phamacies and first aid points around the Adelaide CBD has gone into receivership. ANA administration point to rising costs, decreasing business and a lack of communication - in fact the complete disappearance - of the founders and guiding bodies of the business.
Fans Blame For Oval Damage (01/07/2016)
Investigations into the damaged Adelaide Oval grounds have revealed that the large bird silhouette burned into the grass was caused by a chemical reaction between two different fertiliser products. The two products, both 'slow release' combined with the increased rainfall as winter approahces to create an acid that poisoned the grass. Maintenance crews are being questioned over the findings and new turf is being brought in so football matches can continue.
The Extremes Of Good And Evil (01/07/2016)
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Fire On The Parade (01/07/2016)
An antiques dealership on the Parade, Norwood, was attacked by an arsonist at midday yesterday. Witnesses report a young male of Asian decent pulled up in front of the shop and threw three molotov cocktails through the front windows. Fire crews rushed to the scene but were unable to prevent fire from gutting the building. The arsonist, who's car was caught on camera by several pedestrians, was tracked by police to a shopping centre carpark in Toorak Gardens. The man has been arrested without bail.
Water Is Not Wet (27/06/2016)
The common adage "in other news, water is wet", used as an appendix to an obvious statement may be incorrect. Jacqueline Castles explains: Water isn't wet. Wetness is a description of our experience of water; what happens to us when we come into contact with water in such a way that it impinges on our state of being. We, or our possessions, 'get wet'. A less impinging sense experience of water is that it is cold or warm, while visual experience tells us that it is green or blue or muddy or fast-flowing. We learn by experience that a sensation of wetness is associated with water: 'there must be a leak/I must have sat in something.' Dr Jason Rush of Edinburgh University counters this argument: "The wetness of water is thought to be due to its high moisture content." The debate continues with minimal interest in online forums.
Students Protest Mind Control (26/06/2016)
Students staged a peaceful protest against government mind control and mathematics outside the Adelaide Cit Town Hall on Saturday night. The protest, consisting of about 30 students, gathered at around 10pm and disbanded by 11:30pm. Two students, wearing sheep costumes, were later arrested for drunk and disorderly behavior that was unrelated to the protest.
Rise In PTSD For Vietnam Vets (25/06/2016)
Veteren's Affairs and supporting medical institutes have noted an sharp increase in anxiety and PTSD-related ailments in Vietnam Veterens. The most widely accepted theory is that this year, being the 50th anniversary of the Vietnam War, is putting a lot more media attention onto the events and the survivors of that particular conflict, resulting in emotional trauma for survivors.
Body Found In River (24/06/2016)
The body of a Felixtow man has been found in the Todd Rivulet near the Klemzig Exchange. The gruesome discovery was made by an early-mornigng jogger and immediately reported to authorities. The man was pronounced dead at the scene. Police are treating the death as suspicious.
Fans Blame For Oval Damage (23/06/2016)
Investigations into the damaged Adelaide Oval grounds have revealed that the large bird silhouette burned into the grass was caused by a chemical reaction between two different fertiliser products. The two products, both 'slow release' combined with the increased rainfall as winter approahces to create an acid that poisoned the grass. Maintenance crews are being questioned over the findings and new turf is being brought in so football matches can continue.
Owls Over Adelaide (23/06/2016)
Bird watchers in Adelaide were treated to a rare even earlier this week when several species of owls were seen flying in circles around the CBD. Local birding experts cannot agree on the exact number of species involved, but all agree that this is indeed unusual behaviour for the animals..
Adelaide Oval Vandalism (23/06/2016)
Groundskeepers at the Adelaide Oval are working overtime to have the grounds ready for the next football match. Common household chemicals have been used to burn the grass, leaving a giant picture of a bird in the middle of the oval.
Double Murder In Martial Arts Shop (22/06/2016)
Police were called to the Adelaide Martial Arts Shop on Morphett Street late last night when two customers purchasing an antique katana unexpectedly turned the weapon against other customers. The two victims, shift workers from the Chinatown restaurant "Wok This Way", were both pronounced dead at the scene. Police have interviewed the store owner and are now searching for the perpetrators. The two suspects are described as male, mid-twenties, about 175cm (5'8") tall and of average build. The suspects are considered to be armed and dangerous.
Wonderland Ruined, Owner Still Missing (21/06/2016)
The recently opened Wonderland nightclub on North Terrace was gutted by fire on Monday night. The property, one of two entertainment venues owned by wanted criminal Alister Liddell, was set ablaze at approximately 9pm. Investigators have concluded that fire systems in the building had been tampered with and the blaze was deliberately lit. The fire resulted in a single death. Police would like to talk to any witnesses.
Breaking News: The Intersection of Anzac Highway and Greenhill Road has fallen (16/06/2016)
The intersection of Anzac Highway and Greenhill Road has fallen fell this evening, killing a family of three driving down Anzac Highway. The Premier as released a statement that there will be a full investigation into the collapse, including reviewing structural damage to the Edwards Underground Carpark and SA Power Networks building. Police are on the scene diverting traffic, but have advised people to avoid the area at this time. Trains into the city along the Seaford and Tonsley lines are suspended til further notice.
Wonderland In Receivership (16/06/2016)
Popular North Terrace nightclub Wonderland has gone into receivership. The Nightclub, part of the business portfolio of suspected arsonist Alistar Liddell, is closing down due to outstanding debts. A manhunt continues for Alistar Liddell who has warrants issued for his arrest for kidnapping and firearms offences.
Organ Harvesters Hit Adelaide (14/06/2016)
Visitors and residents of the CBD are urged to avoid dark alleys as after a body was found in Tavistock Lane off of Frome Street. The body, identified as that of a known homeless man Richard Denniger, had been butchered in what can only be described as an amature attempt to harvent organs. Forensics investigators suspect the perpetrators were trying to harvest a kidney but instead removed the victim's spleen - probably due to a complete lack of understanding of human physiology.
Botanic Gardens Bloodbath (13/05/2016)
Investigators are baffled by evidence of a fight that took place in the Mt Lofty Botanic Gardens over the weekend. Forensics investigator Samantha Kirvan states that "There is evidence of a fight, possibly four individuals. Blood tests have shown that most of the spilled blood was from a single individual, and that much blood loss would be terminal. Blood from another individual was found on a knife recovered from the scene, and it looks like at least two bodies were dragged away to a vehicle. We can piece some of it together but without witnesses we have no idea who was involved or what the conflict was about."
Adelaide Construction Boss Arrested (26/05/2016)
Grantham Blakely, CEO of Stafford Builders, has been arrested for a number of offenses this morning. The local businessman is being held by city police after assaulting a number of early morning shoppers in the CBD. He has been charged with indecent language, indecent behavior, urinating in public, humiliating or degrading filming, sexual assault and evading arrest. One shopper, who wishes to remain anonymous, stated "He probably would have got further if he pulled his pants up."
Three Bushwalkers Missing (26/05/2016)
Three bushwalkers have been reported missing. The walkers, believed to be hiking around the Cleland National Park, have not been heard from since Sunday. Emergency Services are searching the scrubland and the car of one of the bushwalkers has been impounded as police search for clues.
SA Power Networks Not At Fault (24/05/2016)
SA Power Networks has been found not at fault for a blackout that affected 2300 residents earlier this week. The incident occurred when power crews were working on underground cables in Golden Grove and the inspection pit the two workers was in collapsed. One worker suffered superficial wounds and the other was rushed to hospital while unconscious. Inspections have shown that the inspection pit collapsed due to erosion that occurred underneath it, but neither worker has been able to comment on the incident.
Camping Store Theft (19/05/2016)
Staff of BCF Richmond have reported the theft of nearly 20 fishing knives. Security footage has revealed the suspected perpetrator to be approximately 6' tall, male and wearing dark cloths. Staff are being interviewed for more details.
Bigfoot Sighting At Chandlers Gulley (16/05/2016)
Supernaturalists are flocking to Chandlers Gulley, Burnside, to try and catch a glimpse of Adelaide's own 'Bigfoot'. The trend started when photos of the beast, also known as 'Sasquatch' or 'yeti' circulated on social media after being snapped by Kelly Spielder, a local bird watcher. "At first I thought it was another birder in a yowie suit", she said, "but after I posted the picture the gully has been full of people with cameras. Noone's going to see anything for a while."
Acid attack in Elizabeth (09/05/2016)
Two people have been the victims of a horrible acid attack. The identities of the victims have been suppressed by police.
Police are investigating if these attacks were racially or religiously motivated.
Rust Around Adelaide (09/05/2016)
Rust has appeared along train and tram lines and Bridges Anzac and Greenhill Road, Henly Beach Road, corner of Port Road and the City Bypass, the train lines just North of it and Morphett Bridge.
Moss Bloodstone (09/05/2016)
The Blood Stone so popular in the news has begun to flower with red roses appearing all over the stone.
Tests of the "blood" have returned two separate results. One test returned human blood whilst the other contained decomposed bio-matter.
It was later to be revealed as a red moss.
AMI Buys Dick Smiths Branding (05/05/2016)
The Australian Medical Institute, of red and yellow billboard fame, has successfully bought the Dick Smiths brand name. Spokesperson Anita Gelding represented the AMI in a small press conference. "The Australian Medical Institute has been providing health care and improvement services for years and we are proud of the work we do. We also have to move with the times, and market research has shown that people are far more comfortable talking about places and organisations with less formal names than, for example, the Australian Medical Institute. Our goal is not only to help people, but also to encourage the conversations that lead to health benefits. Part of this is adopting a less formal name, thus Dick Smiths."
MaskUp Hits Modbury (04/05/2016)
With flu season just around the corner some Adelaidians are following the Asian trend of wearing dust masks out in public. In densely populated cities like Tokyo this is a gesture of politeness by the ill to prevent the spread of disease, but western society has started picking it up as a way to try and prevent catching cold. The trend is being supported by the anti-vaccine lobby. Building on top of this, some boutique outlets in Tea Tree Plaza have started selling semi-transparent full-face masks that incorporate the dust filters. These masks can be customised with painted-on make-up. Kara Golding, owner of Plaza Passion, states that the masks "provide some protection against catching cold, especially on crowded public transport, but also protect the skin from sun and wind damage and can save time by reducing the morning make-up routine". Kara also says she was inspired by someone she saw hanging around the local comic book store. "He looks exactly the same every day. I figured he had made himself a mask - maybe he's a teenager with a skin condition? And I thought... we all have bad days, we could all benefit from a make-up mask. So I designed the MaskUp." The product is causing concern for bank and petrol station owners who, for security reasons, like to see people's real faces.
Looking Glass Hall - No Fatalities (30/04/2016)
Forensics and fire investigators have announced today that the fire that destroyed Looking Glass Hall did so without any cost to human life. No remains have been found in the building's remains, though police are still looking for Alister Liddell and 'Sarah Thompson', who may also go by the name 'Red'. Alister Liddell should not be approached as he is considered armed and dangerous. Anyone with any information regarding the location of these people is urged to call Crimestoppers.
Looking Glass Hall Blaze (20/04/2016)
Looking Glass Hall, the new establishment recently opened at the site of the Old Spot Hotel, has been destroyed in a fire. The entertainment venue blaze was spotted by motorists and reported to emergency services but the building could not be saved.
Club Owner Wanted By Police (20/04/2016)
Adelaide club owner, Alister Liddell, is wanted for questioning by the police, after a shooting incident which left one officer wounded. The incident occurred while police were managing traffic around the recently opened Looking Glass Hall, a drinking and accommodation establishment owned by Alister Liddell. Alister allegedly arrived at the scene of the fire, shot a police officer twice and kidnapped a young lady known only as 'Sarah Thompson', the only surviving witness of the fire. Police have tracked Alister's vehicle to Parkside and fear for the safety of 'Sarah'. Anyone with any information is urged to contact Crimestoppers. The public is warned to avoid confronting Alister Liddell as he is considered armed and dangerous.
Crime Rise In Norwood (18/04/2016)
There has been a noticeable increase of crime in Noorwood over the last week. Incidence of burglary, property and vehicle damage and grafitti have all risen over the last week.
CEO of Malvern Transport Found Locked In Office (18/04/2016)
Elizabeth Byron, the CEO of local transport company Malvern Transport, was discovered non-responsive by coworking arriving at the company's offices on Monday morning. Emergency services were called to attend and the head of the company is currently in hospital recovering from severe dehydration.
Missing Water Crew (18/04/2016)
SA Water has reported that a repair crew sent to investigate a burst water pipe has failed to report back. The two-man crew was send to North East Road, Hillcrest, where a water pipe has been leaking for several weeks and were to conduct a site survey to prioritise the repair. The crew were dispatched at 2:25pm on Friday and failed to report back to the office. On Monday morning the maintenance truck was found at the site where the crew had closed off one southbound lane of North East Road, but the crew was nowhere to be seen.
Christian Youth Worker Killed in Hit and Run (12/04/2016)
Michael Blake, 21, has been the victim of a fatal hit and run on Sunnyside Drive close to his family's home in Evanston Park. This occurred on the 12th of April at 11pm while walking home after running his local Christian youth group. The driver, who has yet to be apprehended, is likely to have been doing up to 80kms per hour when Michael was hit, crash site investigators have said.
The local community are in shock and the family are yet to make a statement however police are condemning hoon driving which is likely the cause.
Members of the local youth group are grieving the loss of an inspiration to the local community.
(An insert shot of Gabriel)
Terrorist Attack On Synthblood Warehouse(11/03/2016)
A Synthblood storage and distribution facility in Wingfield was attacked by terrorists late last night. The attack left a number of security personel dead and destroyed millions of dollars worth of medical eqipment and supplies. Surviving security staff are working with police to identify the terrorists, of which there were at least six. The terrorists concealed their identities with balaklavas and began the attack by ramming the facility with a truck stolen from a local truck stop. The truck's owner, Raymond 'Pinky' Batts, was assualted during the theft of his truck and was rushed to hospital. He is in a stable condition. Once the terrorists entered the facility, incendiary devices were used to create an explosion.
South Autralia's Premier announced in a press conference today that the attack is being dealt with by local and federal authorities. "We are very lucky that the owners of the facility, foreign investors and other intersted paties, have not delcared this as an Act of War under the extrateritoriality treaties that the facility was operating under. We are very unlucky that a small group of people in this country have chosen to deny all of us access to affordable, bleeding edge medical technology that has saved countless lives since it was introduced to South Australia in October 2015. We can only hope that these extremists are caught before they commit another atrocity against the people of Australia."
Bleeding Stone Still A Thing(11/03/2016)
Adelaide's 'Bleeding Stone', colloquially referred to as 'Miracle Rock', continues to draw crowds. Visitors to the rock include:
Barry Trotter: "Yup, it's a bleeding rock!"
Helen Tramountanas: "Not even this Miracle will return dear Petrina to us."
Luka Karava: "It made my headaches go away."
Jack Tomnan: "You'd think this kind of thing would attract a certain crowd..."
Sofia Mills: "It inspires faith. Faith in what depends on the person, but it is inspiring."
Sebastian Vonegut: "It draws people. Fascinating."
Sleepwalking Woman Writes Political Treatise (07/03/2016)
An 82 year old woman walked into the Bibliotheca boor/bar Sunday evening and wrote a variant of Spinoza's theologico-political treatise. The octogenarian's verison defended natural philosophy from both Christo-Judaic beliefs, Paganism and modern Wicca. What made this event noteworthy was that she wronte the treatise apparantely while asleep.
Sarah Lake Scores 3 Out Of 4(05/03/2016)
Local artist Sarah Lake caused a stir over the weekend when she insisted that her Fringe performance be camera-free. The artist has yet to offer apology or explanation for failing to attend the third out of four performanced scheduled. The fourth and last performance, staged on Friday 4th, was also the launch of Sarah Lake's fourth Album. SoundBite Magazine editor Joyce Carlisle has this to say: "I'm not sure what Sarah Lake's game-plan is here. All publicity is good publicity, so banning photography? Actualyl requesting Fringe security staff to confiscate people's mobile phones? No artist can expect that to sit well with their fan-base. Skipping a performance? Maybe there's something in the water. Anyway, the last performance that launched the new album will be well-remembered - maybe the third was a deliberate silence to make the fourth seem louder? Only Sarah Lake could say, and she hasn't been giving interviews."
Woman Crushed Queuing For Bleeding Stones
The Adelaide City Council and State Government have issued a joint message asking for people to be considerate of each other and have posted a permanent medical presence at Adelaide's "Bleeding Stones" after a young woman was trampled by the crowd. Reports indicate the Beauford teen had been queueing up for several hours and collapsed and fell underfoot of the crowd. 'Helpful' members of the crowd dragged her forward as close to the Bleeding Stones as police officers would allow in the belief that the 'blood' from the stones - as yet unidentified - would heal her. When police refused to let the crowd to the stone, violence ensued. Police officers defended themselves with pepper spray and riot shields until paramedics could rush the lady to hospital. Despite the best efforts of emergency services, the lady died from internal bleeding.
Social Media Buzz Against Synthblood
Social media sites like MyFace and SpaceBook are buzzing with rumours that Synthblood causes disease. Fake motivational posters and other meme-based material is implying that not only is the product not good for users, but is actually causing harm.
Pool Win
A pool of six staff form the same company have all retired today after confirming substantial winnings in a lotto draw. The group is keeping details to themselves but if the prize money is split evenly, each one will giving their two weeks notice and pocketing a cool two million dollars.
Synthblood Support
In the middle of a backlash against Synthblood, the medical and financial heads of Adelaide's four largest hospitals have stood together to defend the continued use of the product. DR Pavani Danter gave a short presentation at a press conference highlighting that Synthblood had zero chance of cause an immune system reaction which was critical in the care of chemotherapy patients, transplant patients and those with compromised immune systems. Other points included being able to administer the product at the scene of an accident without having to wait for blood-typing tests - a factor that on it's own has already saved nine lives this year, and that the product's shelf life and robust nature meant that country locations with reduced financial support were able to have a blood replacement immediately available. Hospitals are working with the manufactures of Synthblood to make sure that batches of allegedly contaminated product are being replaced, and hospitals are conducting their own screening of the product to test for a number of blood-born diseases. Synthblood as a product has passed Federal and State testing and been cleared as safe for use. The hospital heads were also unanimous in declaring that anyone tampering with the product should be declared guilty of attempted murder and tried as a terrorist.
Torrens Carp Infestation
The River Torrens is suffering a higher than usual number of carp. The introduced species competes with native fish for food but is far less palatable to river birds due to the high number of bones in their body. Removing carp is a very difficult task that has been successfully performed on sections of the Murray River in the past, but scientists are less condifent would work in the Torrens. "The process two-fold. There is a chemical agent that affects just the carp to intefere with their breeding cycle, and there are mechanical traps to physically remove them from the river. This worked in the Murray because the carp were competing againt cod, which have a very different pattern of behaviour. The Torrens contains several species of smaller fish that make trapping very difficult. The other problem we face is members of the public deliberately reintroducing the species from private stock."
Synth-Free Blood Drive
Flinders Medical Centre is hosting a Synth-free blood drive over the following weeks to encourage those who have not had Synthblood infusions to donate. Synthblood is an excellent product for treating trauma and burns victums, but pure human blood is still needed for medical research. Since the introduction of Synthblood to Australia in October 2015, whole blood donations have dropped to a quarter of previous levels as the public perception is that 'science has cured the need to donate blood'.
Marion ATM Gives Out Free Money
Crowds scrambled to get their hands on free cash when a Marion Shopping Centre ATM malfunctioned and began randomly dispensing fifty dollar notes. Noone was hurt in the incident, though one child is suffering an upset stomach after collecting one of the notes and immediately going on a spending spree at Candy Mountain.
Tonsley Set To Expand
The suburb of Tonsley will having it's local borders altered to claim parts of a neighbouring suburb. The move is designed to 'help the public forget' about the negative stigma the neighbouring suburb had due to soil toxicity from being so close to the site of the Mitsubishi car plant.
Job Opportunities
Local media corporation is seeking editors, journalists and reporters for immediate start. Contact details provided.
Hikers Still Missing
The search for two hikers in the Adelaide Hills is being stepped up with the CFS getting involved as there has been no sign of the missing couple for over a week. Authorities are concerned that even if the couple were well-stocked and rationed their supply, they would have run out of water three days ago. "The cool nights help, but in this heat.... people need water".
Bleeding Stones Bring Crowds
The Adelaide City Council and Metropolitan Police are working together to ensure public safety as large numbers of people flock to the Linear Park Bike Track to catch a glimpse of Adelaide's 'Bleeding Stones'. While a number of religious observers are claiming Stigmatica, Miracle or Sign of the Apocalypse, the State Government and CSIRO have not released any official statements. A leaked memo alleges that if the CSIRO cannot find the answers, the mystery will be handed to the DSTO to investigate - a comment that sparked outrage amongst adherants to the Bleeding Stone's holy nature. The site has been fenced off and crowd control fencing put in place to ensure the public forms an orderly queue to see the phenomena. As of the time of printing, none of the major denominations represented in Adelaide have made an official statement.
Strength Of Five Pillar Economy Confirmed
State officials are pleased to announce that despite concerns over the slow-down in the Chinese economy, the market is showing confidence in the Australian mining industry. Due to local politics the Queensland market experienced the lowest growth as doubts loom over the future of Queensland Nickel. Western Australia's economy continues to grow steadily as a new source of bauxite was discovered and South Australia has seen a sharp upturn in market activity with share trading and share values both increasing.
Sound-Like-Cat Safety Warning
Novelty product "Sound-Like-Cat", manufactured by VWD, is under investigation after a Para Hills teenager passed out while using the product. "Sound-Like-Cat", marketed for the 'temporary relief of witchdoctors', is a soft-shelled gell-cap that quickly dissolves in water, releasing a small amount of helium. The product's warning label contains statutory warnings including "keep out of reach of children", "choking hazard" and "excessive use may cause asphyxiation". The incident has sparked similar concerns over VDW's other novelty product, a high-strength and fast-acting diuretic. As the product is based on an analogue for Methazolamide, currently unregulated in Australia, and sold under the product name "Pee-Like-Horse".
Search For Missing Person
Police are searching Lindon Park and the surrounding suburbs for Angelique Johnstone, who's hired car was found damaged and abandoned in a corner store carpark. Mrs Johnstone, aged 57, had been in South Australia visiting her neice. Concerns were raised when Mrs Jognstone missed her return flight to Sydney on the 3rd of February and failed to answer her mobile phone. "Gran's pretty good with tech, so we got worried when she didn't call to let us know she was home", says distraught neice Bronwyn. Mrs Johnstone was last seen when she spoke briefly with police at the sight of last week's taxi-petrol-tanker collision on the corner of Tapleys Hill and West Beach Roads.
LGBT Support Group Assault
A community centre in the western suburbs was set alight last night by way of a "molotov cocktail". Police reported that the centre had previously reported groups of people hurling abuse at citizens entering the building to attend a support group for the LGBT community. Last night the attacks hit a high point when bricks were hurled through windows, followed by a glass bottle full of flammable liquid. Several people inside the building were admitted to hospital due to burns and smoke inhalation. "We take this very seriously and will be sending a very strong message to those who would seek to harm anyone in the community," said a police spokesperson earlier today.
The Death of Robert Case
Police are looking into the death of prominent Adelaide lawyer Robert Doyle who was found shot in his office within the Office of the Director of Public Prosecutions. Mr Doyle was the lead prosecutor on several high profile cases including the recently finalised Mandy Boorman case where it was found that Norman Green had kidnapped the young Miss Boorman from North Adelaide and had sexually assaulted and murdered the young woman. Norman Green was sentenced to life imprisonment at Yatala Labour Prison. Police are looking into various suspects, as well as aiding in a review of the office security procedures.